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Movie Review: 'Good Boys' Middle School Version of 'American Pie'

by Todd A. Smith


Brady Noon, Jacob Tremblay and Keith L. Williams (L-R) arrive as Universal Pictures presents the premiere of “Good Boys” in Los Angeles (Photo Credit: Alex J. Berliner/ABImages).


Beanbag Boys Ain’t Nothing to Mess With 


Beanbag boys ain’t nothing to mess with.

Even if they do not know the first thing about French kissing girls.

Beanbag boys ain’t nothing to mess with.

Even if they are social outcasts and basically ignored by the cool kids in the sixth grade.

Beanbag boys ain’t nothing to mess with.

Even if high school girls try to bully them.

All of the Wu-Tang Clan fans out there will understand that aforementioned verse, which let the hip-hop world know that nobody messed with the boys from Staten Island, N.Y.

And in “Good Boys,” the beanbag boys come of age, proving that nothing can come between true brethren of friends.

There is nothing like a clique on the same page, with the same message, moving as one unit.

And while hip-hop competitors did not want to challenge the Wu-Tang Clan for rap supremacy in 1993, competitors of the beanbag boys do not want to challenge them in “Good Boys.”

Despite presenting themselves as a strong unit, there are some things that the beanbag boys cannot do together in the movie, “Good Boys.”

Therefore, when it comes to relating to the opposite sex, the good boys are left to themselves, producing a movie that equals “American Pie,” but one that focuses on middle schools boys instead of horny high school teenagers.

The “Good Boys” consist of Max (Jacob Tremblay, “Room”), Lucas (Keith L. Williams, “The Last Man on Earth”) and Thor (Brady Noon, “Boardwalk Empire”).

Max is the Paul Finch (Eddie Kaye Thomas in “American Pie”) of the “Good Boys.”

He has a certain je ne sais quoi and “Dapper Dan” about him that makes him appealing to the young ladies of the local middle school.

Max has his eye on one particular girl who he knows will become his future wife.

However, he has not had the perfect opportunity to shoot his shot, so he just plays his position before deciding to shoot his game.

Lucas is the goodie two shoes of the “Good Boys.”

He wants to do everything by the book like avoiding drugs and alcohol and stomping out bullying every time he sees it.

Max has no problem calling in the Calvary to protect him when he senses danger.

The Calvary comes in the form of some socially awkward misfits known as SCAB, which stands for student coalition against bullying or something lame and uncool like that.

When Max senses danger, he screams like someone of the opposite sex, reminiscent of the way Smokey (Chris Tucker) screamed in “Friday” when he tried to escape the gunshots sent his way by Big Worm (Faizon Love).

Thor is the artistic member of the “Good Boys.”

While Max is chasing girls, Thor calls the opposite sex a distraction to landing the lead part in the next school musical.

His artistic talents are reminiscent of Oz (Chris Klein) in “American Pie.”

Unfortunately, artistic boys do not belong with the cool clique in middle school and high school, and Thor desperately tries hard to distance himself from his true self.

Instead of honing his craft and his talents, he challenges the cool kids to beer sipping contests.

When he cannot fit in, the cool kids begin calling him “Sippy Cup” because of the juice boxes that he drinks at lunch.

Although the “Good Boys” or beanbag boys, as they refer to themselves because all of them own and love their own beanbags, show a united front when accosted by prepubescent haters, their bond is tested when Max is invited to a party for cool kids, and the two other beanbag boys are ignored like Tito Jackson of The Jackson 5 and Ringo Starr of The Beatles.

Although Max eventually persuades the cool kids to accept Lucas and Thor like a young Ralph Tresvant persuaded Maurice Starr not to excommunicate the other four members of R&B group New Edition, one major problem exists with their plans to attend the party with the popular children.

The party will be a kissing party and since no member of the “Good Boys” has ever French kissed a girl, they have to study and practice their skills before stepping foot into the party.

Therefore, when they cannot learn how to kiss by watching porn, which they initially misspell as “porb,” the “Good Boys” have the “brilliant” idea of using the drone that Max’s dad uses for work to spy on a neighborhood teenager and her drug dealing college boyfriend, Benji (Josh Carsas).

But some ideas should stay ideas and not become reality because when the teenage girl Hannah (Molly Gordon, “Life of the Party”) and her best friend Lily (Midori Francis, “Ocean’s Eight”) realize that a drone is spying on them, all hell breaks loose.

What makes “Good Boys” so good is that the beanbag boys are really good kids, trying so hard to be bad so that they can fit in with the cool kids.

Every child can relate to pretending to be someone else so that they can fit in with people that they really do not like in the first place.

True friends will accept the real you, but fake friends will take you away from your true self.

But what “Good Boys” also shows is that some friends are put in your life for a lifetime.

On the contrary, some friends enter your life for a reason and a season.

Furthermore, true friendship does not require daily communication or daily interaction.

True friends are those who you have not seen or talked to in awhile, but have your back anytime you are in need.

Some movie aficionados will scoff at that crude humor in “Good Boys” like some did when “American Pie” became an instant classic in 1999.

But adolescents are crude, awkward, hilarious and ain’t nothing to mess with, and so is “Good Boys.”







This article was published on Friday 16 August, 2019.
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